Description

Thank you it;s nice to know there are still people in this world who care about what happens to all of us who gave our life to keep our country SAFE,I Feel like because i didnt die over there that the goverment and other people look down on me like a broken piece of furniture that noone has use for,and why fix it just throw it away and forget it ever exsisted,Its very hard on ,me my wife,and the kids,,my wife has had several breakdowns and It hurt me so deeply that i gave up on my self,because i didnt think she deserved all the pain,God knows she has lived through hell,And i vowed to keep her safe,and take care of her,I feel like i failed her the way the goverment failed me,But they teach you to build a wall of steel,pain is for the week,show no emotion,But when i met her i had no say the emotions just came back stronger then ever,and i didnt know what to do with it all,so i took alot of things i was feeling discusted in myself about,that had nothing to even do with her,I took it out on her alot of pain i caused her,But she stuck bye my side,shes older then me and could of left at anytime,but she stayed through some severe deppression,and mentle breakdowns,even some violence,i didnt know who i was anymore,but she saw that little light of mine,And i just wanted to give them a good christmass because it means alot to her,Shes every emotional about the kids shes been through alot,and i promised that she would never go through that pain again,And i did the opposit i pulled her into a war she never had a chance to fight or win,Cause im trying to learn how myself,And sometimes i try to talk to her about certian things and she listens to the best of her abuility,shes very sensitive,and has the biggest heart,and its hard for her to hear about the things i saw and went through,and i used to feel like it was because she didnt care but i relized after 2 years that it was because shes an angel and gives her soul and heart to anyone,and sees all good and feels everyone elses pain,and her own,shes very strong,And it kills me that the pain is now because of me,a promise i said i would never break,Im starting to relize ive been living in the nightmare,i was lucky enough to escape,And now im damaged goods NOONE wants to take any part of it,And people look down on me and talk like im a cold blooded killer,and my family must be the same way,Do they relize how difficult it is to wonder if today will be the last day youll be alive,and at the of the night loo